


A Sad Moment Together

by Slice_of_Apple



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, Cuddles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Even though Jean is sad it's still a fluff fest, Grief/Mourning, Hugs, Jean's family doesn't really die in the story as far as I know, Kind Eren What a Sweetie, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Pre-Relationship, Sad Jean Kirstein, Sweet, Tenderness, spoilers to chapter 18
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:00:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25765606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slice_of_Apple/pseuds/Slice_of_Apple
Summary: Jean finds out his family is dead. Eren comforts him.
Relationships: Jean Kirstein/Eren Yeager
Comments: 2
Kudos: 98





	A Sad Moment Together

In the dim light it’s hard to make out the figure slumped against the back of the tree.

“Jean, what are you doing? We still have camp to set up!”

Jean doesn’t look up. He’s got his face in his drawn-up knees.

“What, nothing to say?” When he gets closer, Eren can see that Jean’s shoulders are shaking.

“Hey, are you-?”

Eren crouches down in front of Jean and lifts his face up. Jean offers no resistance. His face is screwed up tight against the tears, but they are leaking out of the corners of his eyes, tracking down his cheeks.

“What’s the matter?” demands Eren. “Are you hurt?” He doesn’t see any obvious injuries.

Jean curls his face back into his knees. He shakes his head, _No_.

“What’s wrong, then?” asks Eren, confused.

Jean is silent. Finally, he takes a ragged breath, gasps out, “They’re all d-d-dead. M-m-m-y mother, my sister, my c-c--cousins. The survivors here t-t-t-told me.”

“Are they sure?” asks Eren quietly.

“Ye-ye-yes,” says Jean, now openly crying. “They f-f-found them.” His hands are pressed tightly into his eyes, but he can’t stop the tears from slipping through his fingers.

Eren settles down against the tree. He carefully places an arm around Jean, pulling Jean into his shoulder. Jean leans into Eren, desperately clutching at his shirt. He’s bawling his eyes out. Eren can feel the tears, hot and furious, pouring out of Jean’s eyes, like a waterfall. All the pain, sadness, grief. It seems like everything is sliding out of Jean in that torrent of water. Eren knows that Jean’s family is in that waterfall, but also Marco, Thomas, Mina… all the countless other people who have died horrible, painful, useless deaths in this neverending nightmare.

Jean’s so angry all the time, it’s usually hard to see beyond that, to what’s hidden beneath it. As Eren sits there, he feels an answering flicker of recognition in himself; underneath the towering inferno of rage inside of him there’s probably the same molten river of grief.

Jean, still racked with sobs, chokes out, “The worst part is I can’t fucking re-re-remember my sister’s face! Leni’s fucking dead, and I’ll never see her again, and I don’t really remember what she looked like! I thought th-th-they were s-s-sa-safe, living with my cousins, so I didn’t g-g-go ba-ba-back to visit them when I c-c-could.”

Eren wriggles onto his knees and around so he can throw his other arm around Jean, enfold him in a close embrace.

“I’m sorry, man. I’m really, really sorry,” he says. He feels like the words are inadequate. The words _are_ inadequate. How can mere words fight against this endless parade of suffering? He remembers Armin and Mikasa’s comforting presence, back when his mother died. That’s what he can do for Jean. He can be here with him so at least Jean isn’t alone. He lets Jean cry against him, and gently smooths Jean’s sweaty hair, gingerly strokes his back.

Eventually, Jean stops. He sits for a moment while his breathing slows. He takes in a large breath and wipes his face on Eren’s shirt.

“Did you just wipe your snot all over me?” whispers Eren. He kisses the top of Jean’s head to let him know that it’s okay to snot all over his shirt, it’s no big deal, Eren doesn’t mind.

He has a sudden thought. “Hey, do you want to tell me everything you _do_ remember about your sister?”

Jean stiffens. Eren’s afraid he’s made things worse, that he’s re-opened the gaping wound. He’s relieved when Jean says, in a raspy voice, “Yeah… Yeah, I think that would be good.”

Eren slides back into a sitting position against the tree, pressed up against Jean. “What was she like… um… Leni?”

“She was so annoying!” Jean bursts out. “She always used to steal dessert before dinner. My mum would bring in the pie, or whatever it was, and there would be a big hole in it.” The tears are falling again from Jean’s eyes, but he’s also kind of smiling. The words tumble out, all about his bratty sister, who will never grow into a bratty teenager, who will never be a parent to her own bratty children.

Eren repeats each thing in his mind after Jean says it, so he can help Jean remember, help him hold on to Leni. Maybe he will write it all down when they get back home, give that to Jean.

When he’s done talking, Jean leans his head back against the tree trunk, his eyes closed. He looks drained, but a little more peaceful, less tattered.

“Thanks,” Jean says gruffly. He reaches out blindly, feels around for Eren’s hand. He takes it, pulling it into him, holding it tightly against his chest in both of his own.


End file.
